I'm moooooooving

Hi Fellas!

So I've been thinking about it for a while now and I've finally made up my mind - I've spent amazing four years on Blogger, but it's time to move! 

Feel welcome to visit my new blog - https://monycaandstuff.wordpress.com/

“[…] I liked him for liking me.” - a piece of journalism I regard as excellent

            From the very beginning, you know what it is about. Love. But not a usual feeling between two people that seems so extraordinary, lasting, beautiful, authentic. It was not one true love. At least not in the full meaning of it.

            Reading this article you fall in love, just like the fourteen-year-old girl, with her eight-grade history teacher. Slowly starting to see how smart, caring, understanding he is. He becomes your crush like he did among all the feminine students. As if you were there waiting for him to look into your eyes, thinking of how amazing it would be if you could talk just with him, without all those other girls. Students could listen to the stories about their teachers teenage years for hours. His unsophisticated look, the way that he walks, speaks, everything seems to be just hitting the spot. You slowly realize that he could use it easily and so he did.

Mr. Lehrer liked all of his students, but it is easily seen that he liked her the most. Thirteen-years-old at the time, fascinated by the new, young, handsome teacher just as I was reading this essay. Even when narrator made it clear that they, the young girl and her eighth-grade history teacher, had a love affair I was still, just like her, containing all of his lies, absorbing a huge mass of untruth and keeping it in a jar full of falsity closed tightly with a lid.

Feeling as if I was there if I was the girl. I fell under the spell of vaguely harmless Mr. Lehrer. It can even be said that I developed an affection towards him. Keeping reading to see if their love will survive, enjoying their truck-rides, discussions, the time they spent together. But deep inside I knew that what he was doing was wrong. Making a woman believe that you love her even if it can be clearly seen that what you do is just playing around with her feelings should be treated as the worst crime. No one should be allowed to play with the heart of another person.  

Months passed, her parents found out about the relationship between their daughter and her teacher. They decided to bring an action at law. Finally, after weeks of therapy the girl, as well as the reader, realized that it wasn’t her fault. She was the abused, innocent, underage victim and all he did was just using her.

                        If it hadn’t been for the title after reading few staves I would have thought that it was all about forbidden fruit which was the love of a young, teenage girl and 10 years older, married man. Jenny Kutner shows the beauty of essay in her piece “The Other Side of the Story” published in Texas Monthly in 2013. She made me feel what the girl feels talking to Mr. Lehrer, being touched by him. I developed an affection towards the history teacher and, just like the girl, at first, I couldn’t deal with the fact that his every single word was just a delusion.

            Apart from the gripping plot, this is written with the extremely large amount of emotions which can be easily felt while reading. It is surely one of the pieces of journalism that I personally regard as excellent. Metaphors, understatements, great vocabulary and the amazingly well written about the taboo situation are the reasons why this essay is worth reading.

Morning with mood swings

It's almost the end of the first term and I'm stressed. I'm stressed all the time, I stress about everything. My job, my coursework, my social life, my lack of sleep and proper eating habits. I'm a huge mush of stress and because of that, my mood swings tend to be much more intense than usual. Good thing that I don't tend to get angry or super fucking sad in front of people, not even friends. My breakdowns usually happen when I'm all alone in my room. I prefer it that way since then I don't need to explain anything. I don't usually even know how to explain what's going on in my mind. That's just the way it is. The smallest thing may trigger something, it kinda works like an avalanche. Most of the times it's not even the fact that somebody said something and I didn't like it. Usually, it's about the mess in my room, the temperature outside, the shape of my face in my glasses, quality of paper on which I printed something. It's ridiculous. I'm fully aware of that. Thanks to being aware of such things I know sometimes how to control myself. It's rare but, trust me, I'm doing my best not to start crying in the library or not to kick the fucking printer. That kind of intrusive thoughts makes me wonder if I'm even close to being a normal human being. If maybe there's something I can do about it but I never did and now I'll be stuck in this swing forever. You can't even assume when you'll start feeling like shit. Sometimes you can't even recognize the feeling you currently deal with. Am I angry? Sad? Ecstatic? Terrified? Aaaaa, how the fuck do I know?
But yeah, I'm stressing over the tiniest shit lately. I don't know why.

Dear waitress, please kill someone with me #1

As you all may already know apart from being a full-time art student I also work as a waitress at the local sushi place. I love my job, it's way better than working at that last crappy place with a dickhead boss. I treat it more like hanging out with my friends rather than a job, which says a lot about the atmosphere at my work. But it's not what this series will be about. Being a waitress means dealing with a lot of weird customers and I'll be describing funny stuff that happens to me during work. Since some of the events are super odd the title of the series is weird as well. I'm pretty sure one day a customer will ask me to kill someone with him though.
There's this guy, let's call him Garry, so Garry comes to the sushi place at least once a month with his family for a dinner or supper or lunch or whatever. He's a lovely guy, a little bit older than me, studied economics in London and graduated three years ago with flying colours. Every time when he comes in I already know what he is going to order, as he never tries anything new but sticks with his basic choice. That's not weird at all since more than a half of the customers do that. With every meal, he always drinks at least 3 jars of sake, and all that you need to know about sake is that it's fucking strong so it gets you drunk very quickly and super easy. You don't even feel it and then - you're shitfaced. Garry gets drunk every single time when he comes with his family for dinner. I've never seen him sober for more than a few minutes. There's nothing wrong with that, I honestly don't care about his life choices and the fact that he's getting hammered during the family meal. But after he gets drunk he starts hitting up on me, which is super awkward and funny at the same time, but usually, I neither have the power nor am I in the mood to deal with that. Last time it went pretty much as always. Started off with commenting on how good I look in the kimono, proceeding to complement my makeup and tell me that my smile is the most beautiful thing in the world. Then after I went to warm up another jar of sake for him he decided to come up to the counter and just watch me do it. Okay, cool, I don't have to bring it up to him, but I didn't really feel like talking to him at this very moment since it was busy and I had a lot of stuff to do at the same time. So I just let him talk. He spent a few good minutes talking about irrelevant to me stuff and then decided to say the funniest pickup line I've ever heard. And trust me, I've heard a good amount of them to judge now if it's any good. "Hey, you're a single Pringle, I'm a single Pringle, we can be two Pringles in a can." Yeah, he called me a Pringle. It started off okay, but the can part got me. It sounds as if he wants me to end up in jail with him. Can=jail, that's pretty obvious to me. I tried to be polite so I just said thank you, but I don't think it's a good idea, that's your sake and then went on to do what they pay me to do. In the end I'm still working and I don't have time for anything else while I'm there. I wonder what I'll hear next. Will I be a chocolate bar or maybe a broccoli?

Types of customers - Sushi restaurant

So yeah... As you may knoow or may not know - I quitted my previous job months ago now. It feels like forever, finally dropped my douchy boss and moved to a place which I actually like. I do miss being a barista, but on the other hand being a waitress is fun as well. Plus I don't have to make food now, which is great, because seriously that was a part that I hated so, so much. Now I work at a Sushi restaurant in the twown where I live and I love it. It gets ridiculously busy sometimes and it would be all good if not for some douchy customers... If you're one of them - just stop, stop whatever you're doing because you are being an annoying little fuck.


1) Dad jokes master. 
Puns that you come up with are not funny. I get it, but I don't appreciate it at all. When I come up to you saying that I'm Monika and today I'll be your waitress, please don't say "Hi Monika, I'm hungry". I know that you're hungry, you came to a restaurant, therefore you must be hungry, because you came here to eat. So shut up and just order. And also - "We've got some rolls so now we can roll" is not that innovative and original as you may think. In fact 50% of people say it so don't be that proud of yourself.

2) Impatient guy
Yeah, I know it may seem that it takes forever, but if you scream at me it's not gonna help. I'm going to ignore you, because as you haven't noticed, we've got the entire restaurant filled with customers, and you were the last one to order, because it took you way too long so wnow you can wait. I'm not even sorry.

3) 'So what's the deal' person
The deal is that you order and you get your food. Just choose whatever. Yes, I'm here to help you, but I'm not going to order for you mate. Stop asking me about every single thing, becasue every sngle roll is alsmot thee same and youve goot the ingredients written in the name, so what's your del? Can't you read?

4) Vegan with rice issues
I don't even know where to start, because why are you even here? At a sushi restaurant? And you don't like rice? But you're also a vegan? So we just have noodle soup for you, but you don't like noodles. God help me.

5) I know that you're fully booked but I want to get a table and no I'm not okay with sitting at the bar. 
Fuck off. Seriously, you annoy the fuck out of me, leave and never come back.

6) Do you still serve food? 
Yes we do serve food 20 minutes before closing but I still expect you to leave at 10pm, because guess what - I want to go home and get enough sleep before my morning lectures. If you don't leave by then I'm going to passive agressively stare at you for the rest of the time you'll be at the restaurant, because I hate you so fucking much and I don't want to be there anyommer. Yes, I do get paid if I stay there longer, but there are some day when I actually want to go to bed before 11. Oh and if you stay up till midnight although theres a huge sign that we close at 10 then fuck you, get in the fucking bin you asshole.

7) I've been here so many times, can I get a discount?
No, I don't even have to be polite about it. Straight up no and if you don't like it I hope you'll never come back.

Working at restaurants showed me how many assholes live around me. I also met many great people and I do love my job, but people like the ones listed above just make me wanna scream and hide behind the counter. I'm not even talking about guys getting drunk and hitting up on waitresses because that's another story for an entire post. Don't be like them, ever....

Morning with mood swings

I'm extremely happy. I have no idea why. I just am. It's weird to think that after a few months of feeling like shit I can finally say that I'm happy. God, I'm so excited about the smallest stuff. It's like a sudden boost of energy and I'm not complaining. Is it because of next academic year starting soon? Probab;y. Maybe not. I don't even know. Tough to explain. I found some new music favourites lately and that may be a factor but nothing especially great happened. It's good to feel good. I missed that so fucking much that I can't even explain. But now all I want to write about is how jolly I am lately and I got a new mug, which is great and I can have an incredible amount of coffee in it. Shit, life's great mate. My friends came back from holidays and we started hanging out as we used to, I've got so many stuff to do and even more energy to do it. Bad months seem to have faded away and new opportunities come up so quickly that I don't know which one to pick. Maybe I'll just go big and start doing everything at once to find a place for my energy. I'm just afraid that after some time I'll get tired again. Being tired is not my forte. I'll dwell on being tired and end up sinking in sadness again which is not good for my mental health. But for now, let me just live my life as I lost so much time crying and thinking that nothing good will ever happen to me. Now I'm here smiling like an idiot just writing happy stuff about everything. Because no matter what - life's good though somet=imes you want to kill everyone around you and stuff just doesn't go your way.

Someone help - how to deal with a writer's block

There are some days when you look at a blank page of paper and you have no idea what to write. Your head is empty and your insides scream for help, but awfully quiet though, because there's noone who can hear their cry for help so you gotta deal with that on your own hun. Trust me, been there, done that. And almost ended with a depression because of starring at the laptop screen for way too long time. Everythiing would be way better if that didn't happen right before my deadline... Sometimes it strucks you when you have no other choice but write, in my case I just take an hour break when my head is spinning and letters just don't want to form any well structured sentence. What do I do with myself when I should write but I can't seem to find any inspiration to finish even writing an instruction?

1. Go for a walk
Walk it off hun, just walk it off. Put your headphones on, turn off from the world and just observe it as if it was a movie, go to a park, forest, coffee shop. Take an hour to look at others, you may take your notebook/sketchbook with you so that if something comes up to your mind you can write it down. Look at others and describe them, think about what they might do for a living, what's their relationship status, maybe they are seriously ill or there's something great ahead?

2. Read something
There's no better cure for a writer's block than reading something written by others. Think about their style, usage of vocabulary, analize thhe plot, character developement and you'll get inspired in no time!

3. Watch a movie
Again - analize the plot, think about character developement, take a not of what works and what doesn't in the movie. What you would o differently if you were the screenwriter. Or just turn yourself off, let yourself just watch it and 1not think abouut anything else.

4. Draw
It doesn't even matter if you can or cannot draw. Just sit down, take your pencils and draw what's going on in your head. Not ony it's a purifying experience, but also your own art may inspire your writing. Art is born from art so what are you waiting for? Sketch something!

5. Take a power-nap
Sleep is the right cure for everything, isn't it? If I'm wrong then my entire life is a lie.

6. Eat something
Not just anything but something that you really crave. Your happy neutrons will go crazy and maybe that will be the beggining of creating something extraordinary?

But the most important tip is - don't give up. There are ups and downs but if you keep on writing, keep on going you'll get there. Sometimes it takes a bit longer, but it's not about time (if you're not facing a scary deadline looming in front oof your eyes, which obviously doesn't help at all) it's about quality of the work. Writing is a form of art therefore it takes time to create stuff. No great thing was made in the span of a few minutes.

Music favourites - holiday edition

I can't imagine how my evening walk to work would look like without headphones on with some of my favourites keeping me company for the 15 minutes of slowly going to work each and every day (without Mondays because day offffffinally, don't get me wrong I love my job). And as for a music freak I slowly evolved to during past few years I've started digging and looking for more bands and tunes I'd like to have in my walking routines. Here are some of them, which are worth checking out!

Billie Elish
This young American singer is my go to when it comes to pop tunes, she's a young artist (born in 2001) but her voice is like a mature instrument with which she's ready to take the world of music by storm.  Recently I fell in love with a few of her singles - "Ocean eyes", "Bellyache", "sHE'S brOKen". I've stumbled upon her songs by chance, but many of you may know them from the "13 reasons why" original Netflix series.






The Neighbourhood
This is one of my all time favourites, but as with bands you can explore more and more. One of my favourite songs by this America n rock band is  "wires" - usually listened by me on repeat while doing my makeup in the morning. Neverthless the band is worth checking out.





Melanie Martinez
This American singer and songwriter is known well from the music show "The voice" where, I believe, she performmed "Toxic", I'm sorry if it wasn't that song, but I'm not up to date with TV shows...ooops. She has a noticable style when it comes to both the fashion sense and the songs. The first single by her I've listened to is "Dead to me", which made a repeat listener to this vocalist, maybe because especially with this song you can connect on a deeply personal level. She sings about things we think about but noone of us say out loud.

CRUISR
Again, this band is from America, it's a pop/rock/indie type of thing. I've never had more energy doing my makeup or running errands wthan I do when listening to one of their songs "All over". This one has a lot of power!! Plus the animation  is the bomb.





HONNE & Izzy Bizu
Izzy is a London based artist and her duet with HONNE the Brithiis electronic duo is amazing! In addition the music video is also great as it was filmed in Tokyo. Talking about HONNE - the band is worth checking out, there is something about their singles which makes you want to listen them over and over again. The thing that I especially like about them is that most of their songs tell a story, that's not only a song but a tale with a music background.

Me, myself & the body dysmporphia

According to the NHS website "Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) is an anxiety disorder that causes a person to have a distorted view of how they look and to spend a lot of time worrying about their appearance." It makes you see yourself in a way that you don't look like at all. Most of the people think that someone with BDD perceives themselves as bigger, chubbier than he or she really is but that's only the small part of the whole disorder. It is the most common case though. Person dealing (I passionately hate using the word "suffering" when it comes to disorders because anyone who does have even one disorder doesn't "suffer from it" as it's a big part of their personality and they create the person and gradually become a big part of their life so we are not suffering from it but rather dealing with that) with the BDD may think that their nose is enormous or that their neck is weirdly too long or too short compared to their bodies. It takes different shapes and sizes, it may fade with time or grow stronger. 

I developed body dysmorphia long time before I started modeling. Growing up I had this obsession about my weight and the look of my body. All I ever wanted was to be skinnier than other girls. The problem was quickly recognized by my mom and thanks to that I didn't end up having to deal with anorexia as well as BDD. My mom taught me that no matter what I see in the mirror the most important things is to love myself, my body and be good to it. If I take care of my mind and my body soon I will come to like the way I look like because it will be the effect of my work and most of the population tend to like what they created. Easy as that. 
It got better and by the time I was 16 I finally achieved my body-goals by eating healthy, giving up on junk food and snacks, working out and stuff like that. I wasn't on a diet I just decided to finally become a better person for my own sake and take care of my health and at the same time improve. 
Unfortunately, every good point in life has its end and my old friend BDD came back when I was 18. It was a different case this time. I grew up being surrounded by taller and skinnier girls than me. At least I saw them this way. To start off by that time I was pretty tall - 174cm, and pretty skinny - (measurements come in the bust/waist/hips sequence) 88/60/89. So basically I was a tall, petite girl, but having friends who were so fucking skinny just made me feel fat. I'm not saying that it's because of other people. Looking just like others still made me feel anxious because although the measuring tape said that I'm just as skinny as all of them I was still feeling fat if not obese. Mirror became my enemy, looking at myself was the least favorite thing to do as all I saw was my fat ass, huge hips, and floppy stomach. Looking back at that times it still makes me uncomfortable. So after a while of hating myself for the way, I looked like I decided to change it in one of the most stupid ways you can imagine. I decided to go on an Alice diet. Yes - all I did was drinking tea, usually black with no sugar or sweetener, to make my stomach think that it shouldn't be hungry I ate 5-10 cashew nuts per day. I lost weight quickly but then I was also sleeping for the most of the day and the fact that I got skinny didn't really make me happy. I was slowly fading away, turning into a mist, I was always tired and I didn't feel much apart from that. Thankfully it didn't take me long to realize that I fucked up and what I had been doing was super stupid because all it had done was a lot of harm to my own body. Once again my mom helped me during the period of fighting the BDD. 
Body dysmorphia comes in different shapes and sizes but it messes with your mind showing you images of yourself which are not real. You have to realize first that sometimes the things you see in the mirror are not your reflection but the reflection of your insecurities and then you'll be ready to fight with the BDD and win. 

Quitting the job that you hate

 I'm my own, personal hero. At least I think about myself this way because I finally found the courage to quit the job that I hated. Maybe it's fair to say that I didn't actually hate the job as the place and customers - I loved being a barista, but my boss... The guy was driving me mad. 

The thing is that sometimes you should sacrifice something that you love to maintain the right state of mind and just put your mental well-being first. Finding a job when you're a student might be hard 3- man, let me tell you that it even may be described as a fucking hell. That's why it's sometimes hard to quit, even if you passionately hate the job, the boss, and the customers. In my case, it wasn't that bad. To be honest just as I said - being a barista was great, I enjoyed serving coffees to customers who used to come in every day when I was at work. In my opinion, I can easily say that I made lots of friends among customers which is great. 

But then we've got my boss. The guy seemed to alright at the first glance, but trust me, he's not. The first thing to start with - I find it inappropriate when the forty-something guy asks his employee "who's naughty" or calls the employee "mean monkey". Sorry, but I'm not into that kind of jokes or whatever the fuck it was. Also, I don't like when someone leaves me on my own to make coffees, smoothies, milkshakes, toasties, waffles and so on on the Friday evening when every single table is taken and it's just impossible for me to take care of every single order on my own. And if I refuse to make something or keep a customer waiting for too long in my boss's opinion he'd go crazy on me. If you want me to work better I need help when 20 out of 20 tables are taken and people are waiting for their food and drinks. 

The next thing that simply drove me insane was every time my boss decided to threaten me that if I don't take an extra shift he'd fire me. Fuck off. Now you have no one to fire so yay you. The other day he decided to ruin my good mood from the beginning till the very end of my shift. Working there for seven months was enough, I had a new job so the moment he started screaming at me I decided to quit and never come back. I don't care about the leaving period or whatsoever. 

If the employee doesn't feel good at work the quality of the provided service by the employee won't be as good as it can be. If a job causes stress and it doesn't provide the good working environment - quit. Put yourself first and you'll find something that will make you happy. 

Wow I'm so positive after leaving the Cafe. 

10 things I've learned at uni

Hold on, hold on - before you'll close this post, I just want to let you know that this has nothing to do with my uni knowledge or the so-called "real knowledge", but it's all about the life knowledge.

1. People won't even think to judge you.

Going to Uni was pretty stressing. As an international student, I was scared that making new friends will be hard as f...., and others will judge the shit out of me. You know what? I can honestly admit that I met amazing people, who are not judgy at all and I feel that those friendships will bear the test of time. Maybe it's just because I'm studying at art uni, but we are so different and still everyone is amazing,, we just get along well. I can't imagine uni without my flatmates, which make the uni experience even better. 

2. I start to know that time management is the key to being successful. 

I'm not the best example when it comes to time management, yet... But I realized how many things you can do in an hour! Everything is possible if you start to plan and you actually do things as planned. It makes life so much easier and you'll have plenty of time left to just hang out with your friends. Apart from that, your grades will be better as well as you can spend more time polishing your piece rather than writing it the night before submitting. 

3. Male-female friendships are the best. 

And they do actually exist. When I would have to list my friends in the uni I would immediately think about two girls and five guys. Actually, I spend more time chilling with my "male besties" rather that girl-friends. If I had to pick, I'd probably not even think twice :)

4. Sleepovers are fun either if you're ten or twenty.

And by that, I mean that age doesn't matter at all! If you want to do something, just do it! If you like someone, don't think about their age! That's just a number, which shouldn't define you.

5. Spending time alone is cool.

Seriously, I started to appreciate the time which I can spend just with myself. It's nice to have an hour or two just for yourself. It doesn't really matter what you want to do with that time. Parts of the whole day you should spend just doing whatever you like. Do you want to take a nap? Do it! Maybe there's a book you wanted to read or a movie you'd like to watch? Play a game, study, make a fancy dinner for yourself. Do whatever you want, spend that time thinking just about yourself and don't feel bad about it!

6. You can say NO to things.

You don't have to do same things as others. It doesn't work like that, you have plenty of options so don't be afraid to say "no" to things. If you don't want to do something there's no point in trying to make yourself do it. Just slowly try to learn to say no. You know best what is good for you. 

7. Working full time is actually pretty fun

You meet new people, you learn new things and you earn money - sounds great and it is great. By the way by working full time as a student I mean working maximum three days per week to have time to take care of your coursework!

8. No one cares about your accent

That doesn't mean that people won't notice it or ask where you are from, but trust me - no one gives a shit about your accent if you can easily communicate with them. 

9. Talk with as many people as you can!

Not only will your English improve faster, but you'll make lots of friends! Just go out and talk with people! There's nothing better than that, and if you'll be living in halls - that's the right time to do it! 

10. Although you may feel so - you are never alone.

I know that it's hard at first, but after a month or maybe even a week you'll get used to living abroad or in another city. You'll meet people who'll become your second family and you have to know that no matter what they'll be there for you. Of course, you'll have fights! You'll quarrel about the smallest things in the whole world, but that's how it works! Not everyone has to agree with everything you say so just... chill, take a deep breath and remember that everything is going to be fine (if not MARVELOUS). 

University can sometimes seem hard, but what in life doesn't? If something is easy - it's not worth it! 

What I hate about working in a coffe shop

Just to start off, I love my job. There is absolutely nothing better for a coffee freak than working in a coffee shop. Although it takes some time to get used to a new working environment it is a pleasant place to work at. But then it also has a tone of disadvantages. Most of which are... customers. Yes - hello all of you coming to a coffee shop.This is rather something that you should probably read. The time has come to moan about things that I hate about my job.

What I hate about working in a coffee shop?

1. Way too impatient people. 
Hello dear, you alright? Great because you are having your lunch break and I'm here to make your waffle, take away toastie and skinny weak latte with creamy milk, but I'm here also to take other people orders and prepare everything. So please don't shout when I'm doing my best. Behind the counter, there's just me and my boss making coffee, in addition, if you order a fresh waffle don't think that I can somehow make it in five minutes. Sit the fuck down and wait, because if you start to shout at me it won't help you at all. Be sure that your order will be completed as fast as possible, but I'm not a wizard so don't think I can magically make a toastie in 4 seconds. You won't die if you wait a little bit.

2. "It's not a coffee I ordered"
Well, it is. I'm sorry to say, but you probably have never seen a difference between flat white and americano with milk, so please just next time... ask. Don't bitch about it later. I work there for a reason and I know that not everyone has to know everything about types of coffees.

3. "Could I get a big americano with hot, creamy, skimmed milk and shot of vanilla syrup?" 
You've just basically asked me for a flat white or even flavored cappuccino, but in such a way that you will pay less than you should, getting exactly what the guy before you got. And if my boss is not around I will probably make for you that fucking cappu, but if he was there he would make you pay more because that's just how it is and don't try to be a sneaky bastard.

4. Mess that customers leave
I've been trying to figure out what is that hard about picking a piece of paper that you've dropped seconds ago and I still didn't get to any conclusions. This is one of the biggest mysteries of all the times.

5. Kids, or maybe just their parents. 
You are at a coffee shop and not on a playground. Please take care of your kid, because first of all it's really annoying and second of all - it's pretty dangerous for a kid to run around when I'm serving a hot coffee and other beverages. I mean... I can make another coffee, it will take me 4 minutes. But for you to have another baby? It can take up from 9 months. (Oh that was dark...)

6. Inside vapers 
If you want to vape, please leave. It's also a cigarette and although sometimes smoke does smell pretty nice, I just don't want to look at you sitting in a corner sipping your espresso, creating that huge cloud of smoke over there. Do you want to know why? Because it's me who gets complaints from other clients, not you!

7. People asking for extras. 
This is a coffee shop, not a lottery or charity. As much as I would love to put a third free strawberry on your waffle, I can't. But you know what works better? Just be nice and smile, then you can be sure that you'll get the most delicious waffle, toastie, and coffee in the whole world.

8. The toilet paper thieves. 
You can be sure that I know about this coffee shop everything. From the names of our clients that come there every single day, through the number of sugar bags on each table straight to the amount of toilet paper rolls. And it's just impossible, that "There's no paper in the loo". I've been there a few minutes ago and there were four toilet rolls. What has happened in the space of four minutes? Please tell me, because it seems fucking odd.


Summing up - as a waitress, kitchen porter, and almost a cook - I can tell you the most important thing in the whole world: every time coming to a coffee shop/restaurant/food truck etc. just be nice. Smile, ask if the person behind the counter is alright, give a small tip, don't leave a huge mess after yourself. Those are just small things, but a single smile from a customer can really brighten our shitty day. Don't shout at us, remember that although you are paying, we are the one's in charge when it comes to your food/drink/product. We can do awful, awful things to it. So please, be nice to people, not only in restaurants.

What does the limelight blot out?

 

All of us know the pretty faces from the covers of the magazines. Their beautiful eyes, perfect skin, wide smile, skinny posture. Getting to the world of modelling seems to be one of the most desirable things among youth. But after one becomes acquainted to this specific “dream” occupation it turns out not to be a bed of roses. 

                 

Most of people starting a modelling career are just kids, waiting for years to pass faster, to grow taller, trying to be more and more skinny, not sleeping the nights trying to imagine how great feeling it is to look at yourself at the cover of the magazine. Been there, done that.  After all the sweet things seen in the television, read in the magazines or on some websites I was full of excitement going on my first modelling contract to Bangkok. And then, all of a sudden, my whole world perception collapsed. They said it was normal, ordinary, that it is me who came out of the blue with some fossil outlooks about my peers.

               

 

            Being used to thinking that drugs are bad and people drinking alcohol everyday are those under serious problem and should receive special treatment I was treated as if I was a freak. It was acceptable, moreover, entirely normal if someone was getting not drunk – wasted, every single day. Doing drugs also wasn’t seen as a bad thing. The most important things was to be as skinny as possible. They could do anything to keep the perfect size zero. Being on a diet, or even not eating at all just to please the bookers, to get more jobs and to finally hear that you did good job, and that you are worth something. After hours of working everyday going to the club to earn some extra money, because pocket money wasn’t enough for food, everything was being spend on public transport. Trying to smile when you have a bad day, jumping in too small shoes and behaving as if everything was just fine after hearing all those mean words thrown in your face by clients. Bearing the pressure and all of the mentioned above just to earn maybe not even 100 dollars for three months. 

                What is the saddest thing about people who decide to earn for a living being a model? They are inconceivably smart, but they had no chance to find full employment in their countries for various reasons. All of them needed money.  One of my model-friends is a lawyer, another one needed to earn money to pay the tuition fee in order to finish her psychology university. Being dragged in the modelling industry it is hard to get out of this rat race. Every single disadvantage seems to be repaid in the moment when you see yourself on the cover of the magazine. It can bring a smile to your face but it will never make you forget what you have been through. 

              

                   Models are the most independent, lonely, stranded, but still emotional and helpful people I have ever met. Although people decide to leave modelling behind  - it have a huge impact on who they become. From a kid living in a fool’s paradise they change into an independent, strong person who can put up with everything and deal with the biggest problems.

                What does the limelight blot out? Tears, pain and the desperate rat race to perfection.

„The changing family”

            Families have changed over the past few years. However one thing will never change – family is a primary relationship – biological, emotional, social and they also carry on the tradition, culture, give the emotional support. Head of the family is the one to earn for a living, take care of everything and is the most important one. Kids are studying, mother is a typical housewife. It used to be like that but can we still call it the status quo? 

            Nuclear families are still around us, but nowadays it becomes more and more normal that Katy is a girlfriend of Anny and Ben is a boyfriend of John. But if they want to adopt kids it starts to be a problem in Poland. By law homosexual partners can not adopt children in Poland, but community makes progress in the fight for equal rights for them. 

            On the other hand we have a single parent families, most of which  have a female head of the household. That kind is being more acceptable in Poland than the previous one. Either you are a divorced woman or a widow – people think of you as a hero taking care of kids and working almost everyday.

            Similar to single parent families is an astronaut family where the members live in different countries. That shows that world is really becoming one huge village and fact where you were born can not influence your plans of living abroad. 

            Families are changing, but are they doing better? One of them are doing great, another not that good. But type of the family has nothing to do with the condition of relationships in it.